A little more than a month ago my family said goodbye to my grandfather. I had the honor of saying his eulogy that day. It was one of the most honored and toughest talk I have ever given. I post it here to share with whom ever might read this blog because I'd like to take a moment to remember him again and to share a little bit about a man I knew very well. Without him, I may have never come to a deep faith in Christ. Without him, I may have never come to appreciate the Christian tradition that has enriched my days. This is for my grandfather. Peace be with you who are reading this post...
"Today we are celebrating the Rite of Christian burial for Richard Joseph Swaggart. This rite has been celebrated by Christians from the earliest days of the Way and has been passed to us through the ages. Toward the end of the 2nd century the apologist Tertullian wrote extensively about this rite and I hope to be buried as countless Saints have been for the past 2000 years. It’s somewhat ironic and appropriate that we are celebrating Joe’s death and burial as we journey through the Easter season, the season of resurrection, to Pentecost.
This ancient and enduring Christian tradition has been passed to me by the Saint we are celebrating today and saying goodbye to… wait, did I just say Saint? The title of Saint may just be the absolute last title assigned to Joe. I’m positive that each of us could come up with much better names to describe Joe… One of us in this room calls him son, others brother and some father and grandfather. His loyal patrons would call him Mr. Joe.
Mamaw Carolyn shared with me that one of the last things Joe looked forward to was getting better so that he could be back to work at Blue Chip and with his friends. He was incredibly attached to the people he met as they traveled through their days. Many folks were loyal to Blue Chip and Mr. Joe. It became daily routine for them to swing by to grab a cup of coffee or hot link. But it wasn’t just for the refreshments that people came by. A few friends have said, “If you were ever having a bad day all you have to do is swing by Blue Chip to see Mr. Joe. Your day will get much better after that!” Others talked about how much they are going to miss him and how much of a prankster he was!
For example: Joe noticed that a customer came into the store for his usual cup of coffee and as always, left his car running just outside the front door. Without a second thought Joe seized the opportunity to jump in the car and move it around behind the store. The customer, not noticing what Joe had done, paid for his coffee, wished everyone a good day, walked outside, looked up and scratched his head, then began to pace, each step becoming quicker than the last. Finally after a few minutes of pacing the man returned to the counter and yelled, “Joe! Someone stole my car! Call 9-1-1 !” To which Joe replied, “Yea! Me dummy!” and held up his keys. We are all well aware that his pranks didn’t stop with seasoned adults but also extended to his impressionable children as well.
One day a couple of his kids needed money for a coke. Joe, never the man to pass up a good deal when he recognized it, decided that they could do a few chores for a little change. See he needed a little fertilizer for his garden. He said, “Alright, see those cow paddies out there? Good… I need a couple of buckets full for the garden. Now you can’t just get any cow paddy no, I need the good ones. So, here’s how you find the good ones. Ya stick your finger in it! If your finger will go in the cow paddy it’s not a good one. So you need to find the ones that you’re finger won’t go in.” The kids must have been wise because they quickly realized what he was up to!
Joe was never a man to be outdone by any man or any beast for that matter! If you said he couldn’t or shouldn’t do something he’d give it a shot just to spite you. Stubborn would not adequately define my grandfather’s personality. Papaw Harry had this great big Brahma bull in his pasture and somehow Papaw Joe got the idea that he was going to ride it. In reality he was probably told he couldn’t ride the bull. So, he told his daddy, “I ain’t ever seen a bull that I couldn’t ride.” So he crept out across the pasture all redneck style and slid himself across the bull’s back, head on the left side of the bull and feet on the right. Papaw Harry reported, “That bull threw him so high that before Joe hit the ground a bird built a nest in his pocket!” Still, I’m told that .5 seconds counts as actually riding a bull…
Here’s another instance when Joe wouldn’t be out done: He took Waylon, Howard, and Bill hunting one winter morning. They really should have been smart enough to know not to go hunting with Joe. I’m told it was freezing that morning and that ice was all over everything. Waylon wanted to build a fire to keep warm and I’m sure Howard and Bill agreed. Joe said, “NO! You’ll catch yourself on fire!”
About an hour passed and Joe began to get cold. So… with the help of fellow freezing hunters, he built a fire. Now Joe wore polyester pants everywhere, even hunting. After warming his hands and front he turned to warm his back side. It only took a few more minutes of roasting before, yes, he set himself on fire! And to make a long story short, when Joe came out of the woods a smoke trail followed him, he had only one pant leg left, and a sock was melted to him. Oh, and Waylon was grounded for life…
I could stand here and tell you, with the help of family and friends, countless stories of Papaw Joe’s antics. Like the time Joe released a piglet at Roy Ray’s Cafe and yelled, “I want a fresh pork chop!” Or, the time that Joe was called to come and get my dad from school because little Joey was gambling. When Joe arrived at the principles office, an office that I’m sure he knew well from his childhood days, he asked, “Was he winning? If he wasn’t winning then he’s grounded!” He even convinced Aunt Alisa that Evangeline Downs was a Catholic teen club!
We could go on-and-on about Joe. We could share funny stories and not so funny stories about Joe’s life. I hope that we can continue to tell stories about Joe as we move forward in life without him.
For me, it has been very painful to see such a stubborn and ornery man struggle through the final days of his life but his passing has taught me what it can be to die with dignity. With effort, I have always been very close to him. I remember vividly trading snide remarks of welcome with him and ending with an embrace. “Brandon Bay
Since I was a teenager, Papaw Joe and I have been brutally honest with each other. It is a relationship that I will greatly miss… For some reason he felt comfortable telling me some of the most tragic and insane things he has done or witnessed. A few weeks ago I crawled in the bed with him and told him to move over so I could take a nap. He joked, “Boy, can’t you see I’m dying here?!” Soon after, the conversation became serious and he said that he was not afraid to die. He told me that he had plenty of time laying in his bed reflecting on his life. He felt that he made peace with God and could move into death without anxiety. I am thankful to have been able to have one last round of jokes and cynicism as well as intimate conversation with him. He said he loved having a second chance to “make out with his wife,” tell his kids that he loved them, and visit with friends. Though he had a really hard time showing it, and in some relationships remained completely absent, Joe loved us. He said that it was easier for him to be abrasive than it was for him to show love. I’m sure we can all relate to being uncomfortable with intimacy at times. Even right now…
At the end of our time, I think he gave me the most valuable advice a young man could get from a grandfather… try and live each day with courage and no regret. “You won’t be able to do it,” he said, “but try harder than I did.” We family know that Joe, in many ways, chose to live without courage and with regret. He told me he wished he had not treated many people in his life the way he did, especially his children. Though my grandfather was never able to muster the courage to right wrongs in his life, I pray I can follow his advice. I pray we, his family and friends who are gathered at the table of the Lord, can find the courage to live without regret in the Light of Christ. I loved my grandfather…
Richard Joseph Swaggart, pray for us, may you forever sing “Hosanna in the highest” to the King of Kings. Pax et bonum…"
1 comment:
Wow. Just read this. Incredibly moving, Brandon. Thanks for sharing!
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